The Old has gone, The New has come

Came back home from family dinner, and OMG.. my furnitures were all in different position. As in my room.

No. am not fascinated by the works of my dad and probably suggestions from my mum.. I think they are into this feng shui thingy and i told them it does not matter if i sleep near to the door or facing the mirror. (rolls eyes)

I guess this is what change gives you when its least expected - shocked. dunno how to react.

And you want to go back to where you feel its comfortable.

Ok. I'll try to get myself adjusted to my newly "revamped" room.. perhaps i'll grow to love the change. (Not likely)

Anyway, had dinner with my family near my aunt's place (she's my favourite aunt :)) Chose to sit with my cousins and brothers (youths) instead with the adults. I guess, i never really enjoyed the company of my other relatives. Cos' they are really boring, talk about the latest technology (mobiles etc), talked abt the usual stuff, their kids education results.. blah. The traditional Chinese cheena family. Oh help me. They are just boring.

I prefer the youths. Always light-hearted, and i figured i can talk to them so much more.

Great to hear that Benjamin's sister has accepted Christ and is planted in a cell group. :) That was one of our prayer made which has come to pass. It has been a joy to witness my cousins' change when they come to know Him. I guess this is one of it.. one of things why we need to be involved in ppl's lives. As in for those ppl that God has placed in your hands. Hmm.. its about time not to waste time. Ha. if u know what i mean.

Ok.. today is short. I have no comments except for the change in my room. *grumbles*

Beautiful You

The sweetness of your words
They filled me everyday
In the stillness, you spoke to me
Whispering in my ear that i am Yours

How beautiful my Savior is!
He puts me above the Angels of the Heavens
And gave His life to bring me home

How wonderful He is!
The lifter of my sorrows
Shelter for my heart

Forever i will sing, Sing of your praise forever!

I am loved
By the Only One who creates me
By the Only One who knows me

How beautiful is your Name!

And i will sing
Sing of your praise forever

Special Day!

I've been reminding myself from the start of the week that whatever the next day is going to come, i'll live it like a special day. Celebrating life.

Used to think that my life is so mundane: Work, Study, Sleep, Eat, Cell, Church. And when ppl asked me "how was your day?" I'm like... "Errr...fine? Nothing special"

I always thought that ppl expect exciting events or those testimonies-that-will-blow-you-away kind of answers.. well sorry, wrong person. I seriously dont have any exciting things to share. (for now..)

And If you know me well, am actually quite boring & quiet. Haha. ok, dont use this against me. =p

Well i guess its all about living with the right mindset.

Today i went to work, not with the usual dread (sian) feeling...just feeling good. Not that everything at work was right. There are still challenging ppl u meet, but yeah, felt peace.

Talked to my colleagues, spend some time getting to know their lives. (Btw, i did it after work & during lunch) It felt good.

I remembered what my ex-colleague used to tell me:" Everyday begins with possibilities. It is up to us to fill it with things that moves us forward. There is no "unimportant day". Everyday, is an instalment of time given by God for our investment."

Everyday is important if we make progress in our lives and if we make a difference to others in what we do & say. It may not be big, all things start small.

I'll remind myself to keep myself clean & bright - cos i am the window through which i see the world.

And If my heart is contaminated with complains, anger, bitterness and dissatisfaction, my heart will be very dark and unattractive.

He sees my heart more than what i do :)

He Reigns!!

Promoted

Received the letter this morning from my boss :)

Really thankful to the One who has bring me thus far (and further to come). All Glory goes to Him. I'm happy though not much expressions shown on my face. Haha. Its not excitement. Just thankful.

Looking back at my 2007 time that i've invested, its all on work. I guess i would like to do sth different this year?

Just a thought. No plans yet. But i'll do it. *prays*

No, not getting attached or having a driving license. But if that comes, i dont mind. Ha. I would want to do sth more closer to my purpose (?) To prepare myself for that purpose, i've to make a step forward first.

I believe that if you seek after Him, all will be added to you eventually.


Anyway, today at cell, we were supposed to share our purpose in this year and what are the few things we want to achieve.


I couldnt quite figure out yet now. not meaning to say directionless.. but always have this thought to do sth extra this yr. I'll share when i have sorted them out. =P


Meanwhile....akang datang :)

I realized that no matter what i do, i must not have the expectation from ppl that they will thank or appreciate me.

In fact, it is only fair. In situations like that, i can tell myself that I do not need their reason in order to work for them.

Today i have ppl running around asking for things without getting a "queue no." and all wants the same attention and immediate delivery.

I feel like asking God to shut them out of here.

or rather i would love to be shut away from them.

But no. I shall not walk by "i feel" but i'll walk by "i will"

I will do what is pleasing to Him, what He entrusts me with. He says they can but I cant. To walk with him isnt just simply a prayer to say "Lord, I surrender." But to live it as you mean it EVERYDAY.

And i remembered E said... each step forward gets heavier. It does, but i will.

It is not Funny

Walked to work today and reminded myself that am walking in His purpose. Whatever i do is for His name sake. Got to be obedient and good.

Everything was good in the morning, doing my work, clearing emails. Had lunch and came back for work.

And this is the "moment". Mails were in huge quantities and each email is an instruction. Work is piling up. Reports on the list. Bite myself and say finish them as much as i can. Ok. set myself to do it. But i was getting there (meaning about to get fed up)

And i have friends like Ever and Eric who really are funny (on msn & email). One is talking sense & the other is non-sense. (Haha) And having Gracie texting me in early mornings to encourage me.. friends are gifts. really.

Sometimes a laugh or an advice from a friend helps. It cuts away those moments when i feel am getting there, to get me re-focus that He is my boss.

Moments like this are a reminder that this is what "flesh nailing" is. No matter how unwilling you are, you just have to move forward with the Joy that is set before Him.

Its painful. And its not funny.

Change starts from me

I remembered when i was new to Christianity, there was always this urge to change a person's mind. I believe it comes from a good intention. To share the Good news. To introduce Him to ppl.

This urge to change a person's mind lasted for quite awhile and i became judgmental subsequently. Thinking that they should change their mindset and questioned why is it that they do not understand?

And becos' of this stubborn mind i have, i missed out seeing the flaws in me. He, being so timely spoke through a book which i've read a couple of times. (see how blind a person can be when they are so focus on the faults of one!)

Not many can embrace change easily. I admit i wasn't a fan for "Change". But you know, when you are with Him, sometimes you'll just have to be quiet and obey. Ha.

I'll share from a book by John Maxwell... a couple of reasons why ppl are resistant to change.

1. Ppl resist change becos' of Personal Loss

2. Ppl resist change becos' of Fear of the Unknown

3. Ppl resist change becos' the Timing may be Wrong

4. Ppl resist change becos' it Feels Awkward

5. Ppl resist change becos' of Tradition (P.K. just shared with us not long ago)

And for the matter of fact, we can't change people. No matter how hard we try to, we can't. This is a truth. Somewhere i've read from a book says, God treats our freewill as a sacred thing which is one of the reason why He does not force His will upon us. This power of choice was given to us.

All the more we shouldn't enforce our expectations upon others.

I've learnt that a lot of changes come from within me. It starts from me. If I can't change myself, how can i inspire others to do the same?

If I can't change myself, how can i even talk to others about Change.

And I like this :

"The greatest difference my difference maker can make is within me, not others"

Its not just the only, but the greatest difference you can make is within yourself :)

Not forgetting the Author and Finisher who will do the change in you.

Silence

I am having lunch now at my desk. Enjoying very single bit of the peace here. All i can hear are my fingers tapping away on this keyboard.

Not that am being AS today but i just want some peace. Some silence. After the whole buzz in the morning, i just want to be alone.

I like silence. Its the only time when you can think and see clearly.

I enjoy being alone (most of the time, now that it is a lack). so if u catch me wandering around somewhere alone or going home early, pls dont freak out. Am perfectly normal. I just want some time off to think.

Not that I dont think most of the time. But you know... airing my brain.

And today i was thinking about the 2nd half of the month of which direction i should head. Ha.

First thing that i need to do soon, is to update my resume. Time to evaluate what i have did for these 2 years and update for the next job opportunity.

Sometimes when i was updating the employees record, am really amazed with those employees that has been here for more than 5-10 years. I wonder what is the "thing" that keeps them here on bay for so long. I am referring to those who has no family committment. Do they ever look out of the corporate window and think of changing environment?

I admit i cant. i dont think i can stay on a job for more than 3 years? Perhaps in the future.. but defintely not now.

Not in a government sector anyway. =p (dont stone me!)

Chris Tomlin - How Can I Keep From Singing

Chris Tomlin - How Can I Keep From Singing

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring
And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

Chorus:
How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives
And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

Repeat Chorus

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

Repeat Chorus

My Sunday

Woke up this morning - recharged.

Talked to Him last night, was reminded that whatever I do is not becos' for my own cause but for His. And whichever ministry am called to serve its not my ministry but His. Served today in choir, it felt good. Not becos' i've learn a new song but its understanding about the purpose. Perhaps i dont have the full understanding now but it will be revealed to me when the time is right.

I like what P.K said about goal setting. Of being SMARTER - the last reason and most important of all was "Whom am I here for?"

Just like how He has reminded me here for each day. Especially when i feel like giving up.. retreating back.

Heb 12 v 2 : "Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Ok, i have to go plan my goals now :)

Its Not About Me

I was rushing off to class this evening and was listening to Joyce Meyer's message on - "Its Not About Me"

Funny how the question came so straight that convicts when she asked, when was the last time we ask God to help somebody? His words really cuts like a double-edged sword.

Its true, now that i've looked back, it seems to me that i've been so focus on work and studies all year that i've neglected the other part of meeting needs, helping someone. One can go on life just like that, attending church/cell, going for bible studies, reading His word and yet not doing or helping somebody. And sometimes it becomes a routine that eventually you find it "normal". You start giving yourselves excuses.

This is scary. Becos' we are accountable. Accountable to what we have NOT done in our time here to help someone.

Matthew 25 v 43 - 45 "I was a stranger and you did not take Me in, naked and you did not clothe Me, sick and in prison and you did not visit Me." Then they also will answer Him, "saying, Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison and did not minister to You?" Then He will answer them, saying, "Assuredly, I say to you, inasmunch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me."

Colossians 1 v 10 "...that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God."

In this 2008, I have found something to work on. :)

P/s: If you have time, go listen to Corrinne May - "Love Song for #1"

Day 1 in 2008

New beginnings are always good. Fresh start of the year is always being look forward to. I like new beginnings.

But...

There are times when you just feel like living in the past.. living in the good old days in 2007. Its hard to bid farewell. Ha.

Moving on to 2008, i wonder what is it like. Its like standing in front of the ocean and not seeing any answers. Is that fear? or out of that comes insecurity? Moving on to the unknown. I know the door of 2007 has closed. I have to move forward.

Tomorrow is another new day at work. I dont anticipate it. There's so much to do and i just feel like cutting some slack. I know, not very impressive. Haha.. but i just want to be honest. You know, i just want to be comfortable a little longer. Yet its not good.

Sigh.. Wake up daphne.. wake up from the past and move forward. 2007 is in the past tense now.

2008 waits for no one. Move on. Be good.